Sterilization: Difference between revisions

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'''Sterilization''' means many kinds of body modification that make a person's body so that it can never make children. Sterilization is part of many kinds of gender-validating [[surgery|surgeries]] that [[transgender]] and [[transsexual]] people (including some [[nonbinary]] people) may want in order to change their reproductive organs and genitals ("[[bottom surgery]]"). However, in many places, transgender and [[intersex]] people get sterilized even if they don't want to be.
'''Sterilization''' means many kinds of body modification that make a person's body so that it can never make children. Sterilization is part of many kinds of gender-validating [[surgery|surgeries]] that [[transgender]] and [[transsexual]] people (including some [[nonbinary]] people) may want in order to change their reproductive organs and genitals ("[[bottom surgery]]"). However, in many places, transgender and [[intersex]] people get sterilized even if they don't want to be.
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Some kinds of bottom surgery that generally involve sterilization include some kinds of [[Bottom_surgery#changes_to_the_gonads|changes to the gonads]], such as [[castration]] (taking away gonads of any kind), [[orchiectomy]] (taking away the testicles), [[emasculation]] (taking away the penis and testicles), and [[oophorectomy]] (taking away the ovaries). It also includes many kinds of [[hysterectomy]] (taking away at least some of the uterus), [[vaginectomy]] (taking away the vagina), and alternatives to hysterectomy such as [[tubal ligation]] (tying the fallopian tubes) and [[uterine ablation]] (stopping the menstrual flow). [[Genital nullification]] can involve sterilization. Of all these, [[health insurance]] that covers birth control usually covers vasectomy and tubal ligation, even in people with no health problems that require them to get sterilized.
Some kinds of bottom surgery that generally involve sterilization include some kinds of [[Bottom_surgery#changes_to_the_gonads|changes to the gonads]], such as [[castration]] (taking away gonads of any kind), [[orchiectomy]] (taking away the testicles), [[emasculation]] (taking away the penis and testicles), and [[oophorectomy]] (taking away the ovaries). It also includes many kinds of [[hysterectomy]] (taking away at least some of the uterus), [[vaginectomy]] (taking away the vagina), and alternatives to hysterectomy such as [[tubal ligation]] (tying the fallopian tubes) and [[uterine ablation]] (stopping the menstrual flow). [[Genital nullification]] can involve sterilization. Of all these, [[health insurance]] that covers birth control usually covers vasectomy and tubal ligation, even in people with no health problems that require them to get sterilized.


How easily a person can persuade a doctor to sterilize [[singular they|them]] depends on that person's [[sex]], not because of physical differences, but because of [[sexism|sexist]] attitudes in society. It is relatively easy to persuade a doctor to sterilize a person who was [[Sexes#Assigned male at birth|assigned male at birth (AMAB)]] or a person who is perceived as a man (PPM). If such a person asks for the most simple kind of sterilization, called a vasectomy, doctors will usually do it in the same day, with no complaint. It is most difficult to persuade a doctor to sterilize people who were [[Sexes#Assigned female at birth|assigned female at birth (AFAB)]] or people who are perceived as women (PPW). This is because of [[misogynistic]] views in society that place a woman's value in her ability to have children. For PPW, doctors will try their hardest to talk them out of it, and health insurance companies often force a mandatory one to six month waiting period for AFAB people before sterilization "in case you change your mind".
How easily a person can persuade a doctor to sterilize [[singular they|them]] depends on that person's [[sex]], not because of physical differences, but because of [[sexism|sexist]] attitudes in society. It is relatively easy to persuade a doctor to sterilize a person who was [[Sexes#Assigned male at birth|assigned male at birth (AMAB)]] or a person who is perceived as a man (PPM). If such a person asks for the most simple kind of sterilization, called a vasectomy, doctors will usually do it in the same day, with no complaint. It is most difficult to persuade a doctor to sterilize people who were [[Sexes#Assigned female at birth|assigned female at birth (AFAB)]] or people who are perceived as women (PPW). This is because of [[Sexism|misogynistic]] views in society that place a woman's value in her ability to have children. For PPW, doctors will try their hardest to talk them out of it, and health insurance companies often force a mandatory one to six month waiting period for AFAB people before sterilization "in case you change your mind".


Before you go to the doctor's appointment, find all the relevant paperwork and consent forms on the websites of the doctor and your health insurance company. Bring the paperwork with you to the appointment. The doctor might try to postpone things by saying that not all the paperwork was on hand. They might also try to put off signing and submitting the paperwork, telling you to do it in another appointment, or to mail it in. If the doctor agrees to sterilize you, make sure you fill out and hand in all the paperwork during that same appointment, or else it could get put off for months longer.
Before you go to the doctor's appointment, find all the relevant paperwork and consent forms on the websites of the doctor and your health insurance company. Bring the paperwork with you to the appointment. The doctor might try to postpone things by saying that not all the paperwork was on hand. They might also try to put off signing and submitting the paperwork, telling you to do it in another appointment, or to mail it in. If the doctor agrees to sterilize you, make sure you fill out and hand in all the paperwork during that same appointment, or else it could get put off for months longer.
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The doctor may try to make you postpone talking about sterilization for later in the future, such as six months away, or ten years away, to give you more time to think it over. Tell them that you cannot wait that long, and that you want sterilization within the next couple of months at the longest. Say, "If you impose a waiting period, then I will seek another doctor instead who doesn’t make me wait. I have already had [years] to think about this. I made my decision a very long time ago. I’ve spent [time period] researching the details of what I want to make sure that this is an informed decision and that I know exactly what I’m asking for."
The doctor may try to make you postpone talking about sterilization for later in the future, such as six months away, or ten years away, to give you more time to think it over. Tell them that you cannot wait that long, and that you want sterilization within the next couple of months at the longest. Say, "If you impose a waiting period, then I will seek another doctor instead who doesn’t make me wait. I have already had [years] to think about this. I made my decision a very long time ago. I’ve spent [time period] researching the details of what I want to make sure that this is an informed decision and that I know exactly what I’m asking for."


DO stay polite, confident, and calm. Stand your ground without antagonizing the doctor or being hostile, crying, or being emotional. If you act emotional, doctors have been known to respond to this by saying you seem too immature to make this decision, or may say they'd prefer to discuss your options in another appointment after you've had time to calm down, or may prefer not to do business with you at all, out of concern that you might get upset and sue them after they sterilize you. “Just as … you should never show fear when facing an angry animal, you should NEVER show any doubt or sign of wavering when up against a doctor, because they can smell it. And it smells … like ‘future malpractice suit’ to them.”<ref name="hollowdoll">http://hollowdoll.livejournal.com/152806.html</ref>
DO stay polite, confident, and calm. Stand your ground without antagonizing the doctor or being hostile, crying, or being emotional. If you act emotional, doctors have been known to respond to this by saying you seem too immature to make this decision, or may say they'd prefer to discuss your options in another appointment after you've had time to calm down, or may prefer not to do business with you at all, out of concern that you might get upset and sue them after they sterilize you. “Just as … you should never show fear when facing an angry animal, you should NEVER show any doubt or sign of wavering when up against a doctor, because they can smell it. And it smells … like ‘future malpractice suit’ to them.”<ref name="hollowdoll">http://hollowdoll.livejournal.com/152806.html [https://web.archive.org/web/20201111215917/https://hollowdoll.livejournal.com/152806.html Archived] on 17 July 2023</ref>


DON'T give the idea that you would raise children if you had them by adoption, or if your partner already had them. If the doctor thinks that you might ever want children, in any way, then they won't let you get sterilized. They'll think you'll most likely want children by birth, and that you'll regret sterilization. In order to get sterilized, you need to give the idea that you are confident that you never want children, not even by adoption. Even if you secretly would like to adopt children, you'll have to pretend to be "childfree," meaning someone who chooses to never have or raise children.
DON'T give the idea that you would raise children if you had them by adoption, or if your partner already had them. If the doctor thinks that you might ever want children, in any way, then they won't let you get sterilized. They'll think you'll most likely want children by birth, and that you'll regret sterilization. In order to get sterilized, you need to give the idea that you are confident that you never want children, not even by adoption. Even if you secretly would like to adopt children, you'll have to pretend to be "childfree," meaning someone who chooses to never have or raise children.
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The doctor will ask questions to find out about how your relationships with others might undermine your interest in sterilization. In particular, your doctor will want to know if any romances you might have could change how you feel about it. Here are some of the kinds of questions they might ask about relationships, and some good ideas for what to say in reply.
The doctor will ask questions to find out about how your relationships with others might undermine your interest in sterilization. In particular, your doctor will want to know if any romances you might have could change how you feel about it. Here are some of the kinds of questions they might ask about relationships, and some good ideas for what to say in reply.


Q: "What if you meet 'the one', and they want children? Or if they already have children?"<ref name="sterilizationqa">http://sterilizationqa.livejournal.com/50688.html#comments</ref>
Q: "What if you meet 'the one', and they want children? Or if they already have children?"<ref name="sterilizationqa">http://sterilizationqa.livejournal.com/50688.html#comments [https://web.archive.org/web/20180902203020/https://sterilizationqa.livejournal.com/50688.html Archived] on 17 July 2023</ref>


A: "If they want children, then they’re not 'the one' for me." DON'T say that you might adopt children or raise someone else's. If you do, the doctor will decide you don't really want sterilization. They will instead recommend a temporary kind of birth control.
A: "If they want children, then they’re not 'the one' for me." DON'T say that you might adopt children or raise someone else's. If you do, the doctor will decide you don't really want sterilization. They will instead recommend a temporary kind of birth control.
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Q: "What do your parents think about no grandchildren?"<ref name="everything2">http://www.everything2.com/index.pl?node_id=1522864</ref>
Q: "What do your parents think about no grandchildren?"<ref name="everything2">http://www.everything2.com/index.pl?node_id=1522864 [https://web.archive.org/web/20200510143621/https://www.everything2.com/index.pl?node_id=1522864 Archived] on 17 July 2023</ref>


A: "My parents understand that I get to make my own big life decisions, and they respect that." If you have siblings who had children, say that these are your parents' grandchildren.
A: "My parents understand that I get to make my own big life decisions, and they respect that." If you have siblings who had children, say that these are your parents' grandchildren.
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A: "There are women (or men) who don't have children, and they are very real women (or men)." Or, "I would be pleased to not be a real woman (or man)." However, it might not be wise to hint at nonbinary gender identity to a doctor with such a crude attitude.
A: "There are women (or men) who don't have children, and they are very real women (or men)." Or, "I would be pleased to not be a real woman (or man)." However, it might not be wise to hint at nonbinary gender identity to a doctor with such a crude attitude.


== See also ==
== See also ==
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[[Category:Practical resources]][[Category:Transition]]
[[Category:Transition]]
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